hello (:

hey! (:

i'm listening to a band song called Chautaugua now. i don't actually know if its chautauGua or chautauQua. the Q one sounds nicer, haha but its a nice song anyway! maybe one day, if i become librarian, then i can suggest to play this song. but there's lots of extra parts in this song, like, there are harp parts and i think piano parts too, and long OBOE solos, so i don't think we can play it anyway ): haha oh well but it really is an interesting song :D if not, ross roy too! i've been wanting to try out these songs since i got the disc from yiyan, but seems like the conductors never seem to hear me. oh well maybe one day.

life is quite boring now. everything's over, and its all just homework now. just got scolded this morning for not planning piano practices at all in my daily schedule. urh ): my mum so piano-lised one, dunno why too. and yes i do need to practice the piano, exams so near alr, plus zhao&karyn's exams too. whoo~

and in july its MAJOR block tests for the subjects i suck at, not to mention, history block test on the first day of school -.- i had F9 for history for CA1, so i'm kinda worried. but its not my fault i don't know the facts! well, maybe partly it IS my fault. i think i should find one day to sit down with yiann and really get her to tell me the whole damn-ed story, if not how am i ever going to pass my history. oh anyway, i remember spelling history as SHITory last year for some time, cause i suddenly hated it haha! really, just move the S to the front it becomes SHITory ((: freak. who ask me go choose this kind of weird combi! should have just taken full geography. or maybe i just like to complain.

and i realised my physics. its just horror. from the start of school till now i never got ANY SINGLE concept into my brain. not one, not even the full reflection/refraction concept. none at all. so the 5 quizzes on asknlearn is just really tikam. well maybe the measurements one wasn't too bad haha (: and block test is coming up, doesn't that just suck? maybe after the block test i should really get a tutor. ohgosh i hate the thought of tution; again. for once i can get tution out of my life, and it has to come back. oh well, till sec4, then it'll all be over. half year of physics, okay that ain't too bad. who knows, i may get A for end year! haha sure, sure, wait long long then get A for physics. :\

Amath too. i realised. i can't even do INDICES now! ohmygod i lost all my touch on math since the start of holiday. and i can't get chapter 3 AT ALL; nothing! really i tried before. i don't freaking get it, i just don't. and comes chapter 4, which isn't too bad, can pass. chapter 5, ain't finished yet, but i think should be quite okay. but you see, all i've been saying about math is "OKAY", not "EASY" anymore D: D: D: now i'm a good-for-nothing. i think the teachers put the homwork there for me to make me realise how much i suck at everything. AND I DIDN'T GET A1 FOR EMATH BLOCK TEST. :'( why can't i just throw myself off the damned building ):

now i'm just hoping for my chinese mock test overall marks. if i can't even get a B3 for that, i think, i may give up JC ):

wow this post turned out to be quite long, but i'm not quite done; there's more subjects to talk about. like music. ohgosh i'm failing music too D: did i take it up to torture myself? NO of course not, i love music ): so how come i can't do well! i've got a faulty brain. doesn't work properly. but anyway at least i passed midyears, when i totally thought i was going to fail. i passed by like, 3 marks? that isn't very good la, of course, compared to cheryl and joyslyn. gosh i can't embarrass the school, i must work harder! music is my love, so i mustn't do badly, since my math already like that, so i must, I MUST DO BETTER FOR MUSIC! :D

and now for chemistry. so many people got A ): that scares me. why's my chemistry so lousy D: why is it me D: cause i freaking can't remember things! i can remember useless stuff, like birthdays, but not facts like chemicals D: maybe i should tag a note next to birthdays in my brain. maybe like, oh it's shirley's birthday, that probably means, means what? shit i can't even remember ANY chemistry fact on the spot like this. how i'm going to pass damned chem block test coming up soon ): oh god save me already.

english is... whoo. i just pray i don't get retained because of it. i've been failing everything non-CA counted, luckily. only those that are counted then i pass. and i'm not doing it on purpose. for english i do everything on same standard one, so i don't understand why things have been happening this way -.- lucky ba, i guess. only for english though D:

i'm becoming more vulgar these days. i scold the F word! ): i can't even stop myself now. its just, the pencil drops, F! i hit the wrong note on my piano, F! the tv drama series don't show what i like, F damn! whoo i'm scary. i really should control myself now. no more Fs ): my whole life is filled with F now, i Fail my papers and scold the F word. maybe scold Ass will be better, then i can probably A my papers. -.-

you know, i actually can't wait till school reopens. oh freak what has become of me D; nevermind, i'm supposed to be at heymath now. oh well, i guess i shall go back to emath shit nonsense (:

bye! (: